The Upside of Envy

How could hearing good news set someone down a spiral of despair and self-pity? Well Suitie, when the good news ain’t for or about you, it can be quite easy! Several weeks ago, two friends told me they were starting new jobs. Another shared spicy details of a new romantic tryst. Someone else recently closed on their dream home. And the list goes on and on. These are many of the things I long for for myself, but don’t yet have. I am of course happy for my friends and know they are fully prepared for and deserving of their dreams coming true. On the other hand, I at times feel downtrodden and impatient about the manifestation of my own desires. 

As I sat in the VIP section of my pity party, the connection between the phrases “green with envy” and “the grass is always greener on the other side” was revealed to me. It’s so easy to covet what others have when those very things are what we also want for ourselves. It’s even easier to be ignorant of the struggles, setbacks, and sacrifices others experienced to get those things. When we are aware of our own efforts, motives, and challenges, it’s natural to feel resentful for not having the things we want (or think we should have) in our lives right NOW!  

Thankfully I have wise and loving people in my life who remind me of the truth and can talk me away from the jagged edges of my impatient and wandering mind. This insight from my twin soul and best friends helped me get to the upside of envy: “Because those near you are achieving their dreams, you are steps closer to actualizing yours. Since you can see positive results happening for others around you, the universe is showing you that these very things are real, possible, and closer than you think. Use this time as an opportunity to refine your vision. To specify your desires. To clarify your goals.”

Their advice reminds me to stay focused in my lane and on my very own path and timeline, and to… Be patient and persistent in the pursuit. Remember that YET is just one letter away from YES! Continue to trust and believe that things happen with divine timing and synchronicity. Celebrate the wins of others because we’ll get our turn too, soon.

So Suitie, how do you overcome bouts of envy? What are its benefits and remedies?